Part 34 - Our Little Secret by Harshita Malik

"Our Little Secret" 

By - Harshita Malik

Part - 34

Part-34...
OUR LITTLE SECRET...

I start my car and made my way to home.Tears start to run down my cheek,and I would yell things every once in a while .I pull over to the side of the road,and put my face In my hands.I let all of my tears out.I let out everything that just happened.One minute I will be crying and then the next i will be screaming things that I know I don't mean,but right now,they feel so right to say.

Not too much later,I finally arrived at home.I waited long enough that the tear stains on my cheeks would be gone and the red puffiness would be faded from crying.I see mom putting bags at the door.
"Are u packed yet?"She ask.
"No,not yet"
"Well we are leaving not tomorrow but Thursday,"she says walking towards her room.
"I have already the plane tickets so,you should start packing"She says I nod and walk towards my room.
I open the door to my room,and as soon as I am in ,i shut the door again.I stand there for a minute listening to the sound of the rain hit the roof.I look around my room to see what to pack and what not.My eyes stop at my nightstand next to my bed,where a picture frame is standing up.I walk over it,it is a picture of Randhir and I.It was a picture mom took of us right after I got out of the hospital.We were standing by each other.but he had his arms around my waist to help support my weight bcoz of my leg.It was one of my picture of us.I feel a tear slide down my cheek,and I pull the frame towards me,making it face down to where I can't see it anymore.I wipe the tear away from my cheek,and lay down on my head.
Tomorrow will be better.
"Sanyukta ,if u are not packed u need to get out.The whole day i have laid in bed,not really wanting to get up.I had icecream and chocolate this morning trying to see if what they say about eating that stuff after a break up really works.But it doesn't.
That's when I hear my phone buzz.
I will admit,I had butterflies.I ran over to my phone looking for Randhir's contact and a message that says he is sorry ,or that he wants me to come over.Or even him asking me not to leave again.But instead ,it was just an company call.
I squeeze my phone in my hands,and I sit on the floor.without even thinking about it I start to cry.if dad was here right now,he would tell me to stop crying.Then he would bend down next to me and whisper,"its only for the better ,sweet heart"
The thought of dad made me cry even more.Everything in life is just is being turned upside down.Just a few weeks ago,if u would have asked me how my life was.I would have answered u with an honest answer.It was perfect.

I finished my packing and again lay down on my bed,thinking about Randhir.
If someone asked me to explain him in words,I can't bcoz he is so much more than one thing.He is kind,he is passionate, he is good listener,an amazing Friend,someone you could always go to ,and much more.
I check my phone yet again.Nothing.Why do I keep checking it?I know he won't text me.He meant what he said last night ,and so did I.
No I didn't.
I would take him back in a second.
I love him.
Another tear slide down my cheek,and I hold back the tears ,i can't keep crying over him bcoz that won't do me any good.All of my pain put together won't bring someone back.
I love Randhir.But crying tears over him isn't going me to help any.He choose not to support my decision about going with mom and dad,and that's something that he should be there for me on.But instead he was thinking about how we can't be together,when Dad is main purpose for everything.
That's when mom walk into my room.
"Sanyu?"She asks little worried.She can probably tell I have been crying.I wipe any remaining tears from the brim of my eyes and stand up.I give her a fake smile.
"Hey mom"I say,she stares at me for a minute and then wipe of the smeared make up around my eyes that i left.
"Sanyukta, why have u been crying?"she ask.I just stare at her for a minute not knowing if I should tell her or not.if she hasn't know about Randhir this long,why i tell her now?just tell her that you and the fake Randhir broke up.
"Randhir and I broke up last night" I explain.
"Sit down and tell me everything"she says with sorrow on her face walking over to my bed and sit on the edge with me.
I explain everything to her.I tell her about our fight and the selfish words we shared.I still don't know if i meant what I said or not,or if he did.
"Everything will be fine"She says giving me a hug,and i hug her back.tightly .its exactly what I need right now.
"I just can't stop crying"I say looking down my hands.
"Listen here"she says lifting up my chin so i can look
'"In life u will fall,u will rise.,you make mistakes,u live u learn.You live you learn.you are human.you are not perfect.you have been hurt.but u are alive.Think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive to breath ,to think,to enjoy and to chase the things you love.Sometimes there is sadness in our journey,but there is also lots of beauty.We must keep butting one foot infront of the other even when we hurt,for we will never know what is waiting for us just around the corner"Mom says,I sigh.and give her a real smile.she is right..I have to be strong.
"I know it hurt now, and its OK to cry.just don't unpack there.wake up the next morning and live ur life.if its meant to be ,it will happen.if not,then that door was such for a reason."she says and kisses my head leaning in.
"Keep ur head up sunshine.the sun will come out tomorrow"she says with a smile.
I still have that little piece in my heart that wishes it was meant to be.

......To be Continue in the next Part !!

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